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Mon, Jan 26, 2009
Mezco Toyz, oh those masters of the horrific and unsettling, have once again taken the figural reins for the upcoming Friday the 13th relaunch, providing the 7″+ tall, fully articulated little incarnation of this new vision of Mr. Jason Voorhees, complete with an assortment of screen-accurate weapons. And if you doubt me about ‘unsettling’, I have two words for you: Gangsta Babies.
Loyal ToyCyte readers, now is your chance to win this minty fresh Jason figure directly from Mezco. Between now and Thursday, February 12th, we invite you to use the comments section down below and write a postcard home from Camp Crystal Lake. You know, that postcard that you had time to write between violent slayings. On Friday, February 13th, we’ll choose our favorite postcard, contact you and Mezco will happily send a deadly little plastic friend your way.
Be creative, have fun, get free toys.
Collin David - who has written 373 posts on ToyCyte: Toy Culture Collected.
Collin has a deep affection for all things toyetic, animated and tentacled. He draws and paints a lot, and doesn't get to sleep until very late.
January 27th, 2009 at 7:32 am
Dear Mom,
All of my friends have been brutally murdered here at camp but I’m still having a better time here than I would have at home listening to you nag at me about how I need to get a summer job and clean my room.
Love,
your son
January 27th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
Hi Dad,
Camp is great! Last week I got my jr. yeoman certificate at the archery range! (Right, I don’t know what the heck a yeoman is, either.) I really liked it, but for some reason the range is closed this week, so I have to take pottery instead. All the counselors are really cool, but I’ve been seeing less and less of them around. Alice says that they’re still cleaning up some of the cabins + activity areas since the camp has been closed for so long, but it’s a little weird. I haven’t seen one of my bunk counselors in, like, days. I wish i could call home and tell you all of this, but they say that the phones are out or something. I still hate Jersey.
You’re still coming up for parents weekend, right? I really want you to meet everyone!
Love you, miss you!
~M’ris
January 28th, 2009 at 2:52 pm
MOM,
WHERE DID YOU SEND ME, THE KIDS ARE CALLING THIS PLACE CAMP BLOOD, THEY KEEP TELLING ME SOME RETARDED KID JASON IS GOING TO GET ME. IM REALLY SCARED. THE CAMP COUNSELORS AREN’T EVEN PAYING ATTENTION TO US. I FOUND THIS PLACE I AM WRITING YOU FROM IN THE WOODS, ITS A HUT OR SHACK BUILT FROM GARBAGE IT LOOKS LIKE.,……………SOMEONES HERE………HES HOLDING THE COUSELORS HEAD..PLEEEEAAASE HELP, SEND HELP MOMMIE.
RONNIE
339 CLINTON STREET
VANDLING ,PA 18421
January 30th, 2009 at 2:31 am
dear mom and dad!
I need you to send help!!!theres something crazy going on here at camp crystal lake.There have been multiple murders and my friend tom is missing!My car will not start and me and tom found the sheriff dead not to long before tom ended up missing.Im more scared then i have ever been in my whole life!No phones,No police,hell i never seen the postman around here so im praying to god that you will somehow get this postcard.Just incase i die here i want yall to know i love you both very much and i always knew you wanted the best for me.This may sound crazy also but i swear i seen a guy with a hockey mask or something wondering in the woods.this may be my mind playing tricks on me,but just incase please inform the cops this.I am going to try to get out of here to find help or a mail box.its getting dark and im starting to get worried…im hearing noises.HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
your son,
Jason
January 30th, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Camp is really fun. Yesterday we went boating in the lake, today we went hiking in the woods. The counsellers are always running off into the woods together but we can do fine without them.
I’m making a belt right now in craft class and later I think we are doing archery or hockey, I see one of the counsellors in a hockey mask but he has a bow and arrow,.. and an ax. hmmm, we might be cutting down trees. Ok talk to you soon.
Billy
January 31st, 2009 at 8:19 pm
Hey Mom hey dad.Its getting bad here at camp.Yesterday was going to be craft day but another body was found in the kiln.Today was going to be the relay race but the kid that was suppose to run the last leg was found with no legs.Im thinking this not such a safe place.Tried to sneak out in disguise but someone stole my goalie mask.If I catch who took it I’ll give him cement shoes and throw him in the lake.Oh well Mike(you know the one I went trick or treating with last Halloween) has a couple of Star Trek masks maybe they will work.If we make it out I will write again.
Send To:
Mom and Dad
13666 Elm Street
Kingsland, Texas
February 2nd, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Hey mom,
It’s Friday the 13th 2009 and several of my friends are gone because of a madman in a hockey mask. Send help ASAP, but don’t worry I have managed to get away every time so far =/ but fatigue is taking it’s toll. Please do not come yourself send help because if you come he will kill you, I only have a little time left till he finally gets me. I have to go now because he is near me and I think he spotted me. Love yah
Love,
Chase
February 2nd, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Hey Jude,
So, I just arrived at camp and I’ve already made friends. There’s a small bald boy that, despite his slight deformity, is a real cut up. All the counselors are nice too. They try to play hide and seek with us at night, but they’re horrible! All the screaming and moaning is a dead giveaway! My best friend so far is Miss Pam. She’s great, she cooks for the campers. She has a really cool jeep, too. And she’s always prepared! She keeps a machete in the back, for snakes! The only weirdo is Ralph, the groundskeeper. He keeps so many tools in the shed! Anyways, gotta go. We’re going to teach the bald kid how to swim!
Love, Frederick
February 2nd, 2009 at 8:28 pm
Hi Mom! Camp is great! We had a party the other night. It got a little crazy and some counselors lost their heads. We still haven’t found them. Then we went to the archery range today. We played a really fun game that the cook told us about. We shot arrows at the counselors and they would try to catch them. They caught them alright! Tomorrow the cook is going to let us help her sharpen the knives and we’re going to build a shack in the middle of the woods. She’s a really nice lady but she keeps calling everyone Jason and tells us to wear our floaties when we go swimming. Well gotta go. We’re going to play catch the ax with the drunk caretaker.
Joe
February 3rd, 2009 at 8:59 am
Mom and Dad,
You had 2 choices when sending me to camp.
You picked Crystal Lake, dunno how much reasearch you did. What with the internet and all but you should have been able to tell they have been 100+ murders here since the 80′s by a large man in a hockey mask and his mother. People are dying left in right in gory and creative ways, the other day I went to the mess hall and a kid had been slit from gullet to groin and his guts were laying out in alphabetical order, another guy had his head ripped off and a flashlight inserted in it in it like a sick Jack-O-Lanturn. I fear for my life every second of every day I am here.
However, since the other choice was Rosie O’Donnells Nude Arobics Camp, I still feel you made the right decision sending me here.
Hope to see you soon, even if it is on a metal slab for body ID.
Your loving son,
Don
February 4th, 2009 at 6:56 pm
mom,dad
hey guys having lots of fun but at night i hear noises and the campers have been going missing the cops say they ran off but there lying they new about jason and his mom there trying to make us think that we will be fine but every night i go to sleep less and less campers show up and the lake has gottin realy smelly and red the last time i went swimming i think i found a finger pleas hurry someones at my window with with a machete and has my best freinds head heeeeeeeeeeeelllllllp
i might not see you again love louie aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
February 5th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Dear Mom,
I’m having a great time here at camp crystal lake,We went on a boat but something pulled Alex (my best friend) underwater i have no idea what it was,but don’t worry i’ll be OK,OH i forgot to tell you that a little 11 year old boy drowned here in 1957 and they say he’s back to have his revenge and murder who ever gets in his way.
February 7th, 2009 at 9:44 am
Dearest Mother and Father,
This is the best camp ever – no matter how you slice it. I never cut class because I am learning SO very, very much. I have a cool mentor who is patient with my questions – even if I butcher them. I am going outside to take a stab at some new axtivities. This place is a dream – see you real soon!
Love-
Freddy Kruger, Jr.
February 7th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
Dear Mom,
You know how you always said that I was living up to my potential? Well a raving maniac has been running around the Camp Crystal Lake. His name is Jason. Not only is he killing all the kids. He is also killing the Camp Counselors. By the time you read this I could be dead, or I could be head Camp Counselor. Let’s hope for the best.. Love you..
February 8th, 2009 at 5:29 am
Hi Mumsie & Dadsie!
Here’s the run down I promised on the amazing trip I won as part of the “Weed out the riff-raff” program of Crotsche Grypp High School.
Day 01 – We drove for fourteen hours, and finally “pants’d” Jill, our 27 year old camp counselor who claimed to be 18 and had 44DD breasts. I thought we should “shirt” her, but was voted down. Also, I think Tommy brought his HD Camcorder, but forgot to bring tape. Later, we pants’d Tommy for using Jill’s diaphragm to drink shots of Vick’s Cough Syrup.
Day 02 – Finally arrived at Camp Blood…err..Camp Crystal Lake. We took the usual tour around Creepy Killer Woods, got a rash at Murderous Bar-B-Q Hill, ran through Serial Killer Falls, found a dead headless skunk in my pants, and Tommy got a boner when he saw a canoe filled with empty gas cans and a comic book. We’re all worried about Tommy.
Day 03 – We were supposed to go hunting for deer, but now two kids are missing. I wish one of them was Tommy.
Day 04 – Alexander and Sally said they saw some nut job in a hockey mask peeking in the girl’s shower. We looked and found nothing. Later, as the girls showered, we all found several holes and started peeking as well, until Tommy “pants’d” me. Wish I had worn underwear that day. So did everyone else…
Day 05 – Tommy pissed everyone off last night by lighting his farts, so I killed him and blamed it on the nut job with the hockey mask. No one misses him at all.
Day 06 – Sally told everyone she was into weird things, so Joey spanked her with a boat paddle covered with Poison Ivy. Sally killed Joey, and I helped her throw the body in the lake. Later, Sally disappeared, and I think someone has taken my hockey mask and machete’ again.
Day 05 – Jill has disappeared, and all the guys cried for two hours when they found out. Later we found Jill, dead in the toilet, and also found out that Jill is really a guy named Willie Chateau from Reno, Nevada (according to the driver’s license).
Day 06 – Two more kids are gone, and I don’t know why we haven’t left yet. The police showed up, and most of us hid in the woods until they left. Later I checked the bus for gas, and the tank was half full. I miss my sweater and hat, ’cause it’s cold out here at night.
Day 07 – I found my hockey mask and machete’! It was taken by a smelly and sickly “near corpse” dude named Jay-something. He brought beer, so we all sat around a bonfire and got drunk, then pissed off a raccoon until it ate Alexander.
Day 08 – I woke with another dead headless skunk in my pants and a terrible hangover. I found that Jay dude, and took back my mask and machete’. He went postal, chased me for ten minutes, waited to build suspense, nearly caught me, then I ran over him with the bus which I’m now driving home. I might stop off by Dangerous Killer Elm Forest, so don’t wait up for me. Love yas!!!
Your son,
Zodie Acque
February 9th, 2009 at 7:17 am
Kill them mom.
Love
JV
February 9th, 2009 at 7:32 pm
July 13th 1957
Mom,
Camp is not fun. I got my own cabin but it is small and dirty. My sleeping bag is gone, so I am sleeping on life jackets. At night I hear noises. I miss you. I miss Dad, but I know you said he hurt us and he was bad. Some kids at camp are bad and they laugh at me. The water is cold and I stay away, but they say I have to swim. I wont. Maybe I can come home early and have summer with you.
Love, Jason.
February 11th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
dear parents,
im going to be flat out honest with you and please don’t take this as a joke,im being very serious!
i came to camp crystal lake because i thought it was going to be fun.at first there was alot of cool things that i did but then i started to hear stories from other people who have been around the area or know about it.
it was said that a boy drowned in the water here and nobody helped him…his name was jason voorhees.so his mom decided to take revenge and started killing people like the councelors and stuff.well the mom of this child ” jason ” was decapitated and died in like 79′ so legend has it that her son came back to life or what have you,and started killing people all around the area.
now normally i wouldnt get freaked out because it sounds like a childs story,but now i know its all true.
People that i know here were starting to disapear,at first i thought it was a joke on me,but it went by to long.i started to search for my friends and when i did i found half of them dead and a few still missing!!!!
i swear to you!one had been split straight down the middle of there body,looks like with a large knife or axe or machedy could have done it.
then i found my friend bobby hanging from a rope with his insides litterally hanging outside in some abandon looking cabin i found while searching for my friends.after seeing those 2 dead i really started
to freak out big time and decided not to look anymore and just go find help.well i ended up running through the woods and tripped right over my other friend kevin!well what was left of him.he had been laying dead on the ground because his legs and arms were completely off his body.i took a minute to throw up because i never seen anything like the things i seen here.then started running again to find a way out or help.
but as im running,this guy in a hockey mask apears in the woods,i seen him plain as day,he looked wet,old clothes ripped up head looked deformed from what i could see,cause he did have a mask on his face.and a large machedy/knife of some sort with blood all over it.
i knew right then that this was the guy jason that i heard the stories about!
i ran as fast as i could.i found another cabin somewhere around here
and found a blank postcard a pencil from i guess from the people who visited here before.anyways,im here now hiding in a dark spot with not much light writing you this,i hope i spelled stuff right but right now i dont really care.i have a feeling he will find me anytime now so
im going to try to send you this postcard if i can make it out and find a place to send.if not maybe someone will find it later in life and give it you all so you know what happened and what i seen( plus theres still friends missing like tommy and angela ).
im a man and dont get scared much but this is really making me think my life is over.i seen what happened to my friends.
OMG!!!!!!!wait! i think someone is coming in here…
ITS HIM! PLEASE MOM AND DAD OR ANYONE WHO FINDS THIS POSTCARD!
JASON VOORHEES IS REAL,HE KILLED MY FRIENDS AND NOW IM BOUT TO DIE!!!!
PLEASE LET MY FAMILY KNOW I LOVE THEM AND IM NOT GOING DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT!
JOHNATHAN
February 12th, 2009 at 10:06 am
Dear Mom and Dad,
Camp is fun I miss you guys. How is Sparky? I have done so much fun stuff here. We went hinking and I shot a bow and arrow. I have made lots of friends here. There is this one kid that’s funny lookin and we all make fun of him. No one likes him. He mostly likes being alone. We don’t like him cause he can’t swim. I think he ran away from camp. It’s almost dinner time and Pam the cook just got hereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
February 12th, 2009 at 10:17 am
Hey Suzi!
I’m so glad you helped me a job here at Crystal Lake.It’s so much better than working at the malt shop all summer. It sucks that you broke your anke and you can’t be here. There are sooooo many cute boys. I am meeting so many cool people. Me and this cute guy Tim are giving “swimming lessons” right now. He is such a good kisser. We gonna sneak off to a cabin in a minute for some “private lessons”. Well gotta go the bald kid is making an awful ruckus out there. Ugg that kid is such a pain.
XOXOXO,
Julie
February 12th, 2009 at 10:23 am
Dear Dad,
I’m here at camp with Mommy. She gets to be the cook. We get to go for walks after dinner. I want to go home. I don’t like it here. The kids all make fun of me. This one kid named Steven is really mean. He says I’m funny lookin and makes fun of me cause I can’t swim. I told Mommy.she’s gonna talk to him. I’m gonna go learn to swim now. Tim and Julie are gonna teach me.
Love
Jason
February 12th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
Hi Mom,
Thanks for sending me that box of cookies but I couldn’t eat them, there was some weird red stuff smeared on the outside of the box that smelled horrible. The delivery man said there would be more from where that came from, so I guess you might know him. I didn’t really see his face, as he had just come from hockey practice and was still wearing his mask. He seemed nice with a bit of mystery about him. I hope to see him again.
Speaking of seeing people, I haven’t seen my new friend Alice anywhere. She said she was going to the lake to swim but that was two days ago. I think she ran away. I’m worried about her. I woke up one night to a loud noise, but it just seemed to be a cat screeching.
Write back. I’d literally be bored to death if it weren’t for your letters and gifts.
Love,
Sara
February 16th, 2009 at 7:31 pm
Thanks a bo-jillion to everyone for participating! After much reading over the excellent entries, and a few violent fistfights, the panel of judges could agree on one thing :
Don of the Dead’s postcard made us laugh.
Our lists of favorites coincided at that one point. Honorable mentions certainly go to the more epic posts among you, but unfortunately, unless you have some kind of superpower or magno-eyes of Ant-Man pants, fitting that stuff on the back of a postcard is a relative impossibility.
Don de los Muertos, your info is being forwarded on to Mezco’s saucy Mike Drake, who will fulfill your every desire.
Stay tuned for the plethora of contests that ToyCyte is wont to run. Your time shall come.